My Trip Around The Sun

There’s a Jimmy Buffett song that he sings with Martina McBride – Trip Around The Sun.  Take a listen http://video.search.yahoo.com/video/play?p=trip+around+the+sun&tnr=21&vid=5003680518045701&turl=http%3A%2F%2Fts2.mm.bing.net%2Fvideos%2Fthumbnail.aspx%3Fq%3D5003680518045701%26id%3D259e5ec7809b4273891059b4b79e5575%26bid%3DT4OL7p%252bq1mx41A%26bn%3DThumb%26url%3Dhttp%253a%252f%252fwww.youtube.com%252fwatch%253fv%253d3dV1myAW2Cs&rurl=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3D3dV1myAW2Cs&sigr=11a73glsb&newfp=1&tit=Trip+Around+The+Sun+-+Martina+Mcbride+Jimmy+Buffett

My office just celebrated my birthday with cupcakes from the Cupcakerie (yum) and I can honestly say that this past year has not been a “piece of cake”.   But in the words of Jimmy – “You never see it coming, but always wonder where it went – and only time will tell if it was time well spent.”   Today I am wearing my “Time Well Spent” bracelet and I can honestly say that yes, the past year has been time well spent. 

I started this journey talking about shopping and fashion.   As the seasons changed, so did my focus and thus the focus of my blog.  I spent some time last night reflecting on my year and reading some of my different 190+ blog entries – I wanted to share some of my personal favorites – not the outfits, but the personal parts of the journey that have shaped the person that I am today.

September 3, 2011 – Together We Are What We Can’t Be Alone – I had just returned from a Dropkick Murphys Show in Pittsburgh.   The premise is that we can accomplish so much more together than we can alone – My favorite line from that blog “What about people?   Are there people in your life that you are better with than without?   With that person or people, do  you feel like you can conquer the world?   Are you happier, more productive and just a better person when those people are in your life?    The movie line “You make me want to be a better man” is classic and fits here as well”.   https://oneoutfitoneday.wordpress.com/2011/09/13/together-we-are-what-we-cant-be-alone/

December 21, 2011 – All I Want For Christmas.   Everything in this entry still remains the same – what I want out of life is love, happiness and passion.  What else is there?   https://oneoutfitoneday.wordpress.com/2011/12/21/all-i-want-for-christmas/

December 14, 2011 – My Favorite Things.  This weekend I intend to experience a few of those, including live music, good friends and alcohol.  Thanks Joelle.  https://oneoutfitoneday.wordpress.com/2011/12/14/my-favorite-things/

End of January, 2012 Glimpses Into Our Past – Letters from my grandpa to my grandpa.  My favorite part of those letters “Got here about 6 oclock.  The rate of fare has raised since I went down.  It cost me including taxi and a little lunch $6.93 to get back to Columbus.   If it had been many times that, it would have been a joyful trip for me.  The worst part being when I had to leave you.   Feb. Mar. Apr. May. June   I can see in the distance, an image that will bring happiness to me.  Each day will be nearer my dear, when that happy day in June is drawing near.   As I look in that direction I can see in the distance the day approaching, that will bring happiness to you and I.”  Thank you to the grandpa I never met for passing on your romantic genes to me.

February 24th – Letter to Me.  I just re read it and I know that my future self will be all of those things.  I will not fail.   https://oneoutfitoneday.wordpress.com/2012/02/24/letter-to-me/

There are many more moments over the past year that are bringing tears to my eyes as I write this.   The moments have been full of intense joy and immeasurable pain.  There is no rhyme or reason for the past year, only the reality that is the future.   I watched the movie Sabrina last night and as Audrey Hepburn is getting ready to leave Paris, she is writing her final letter home to her father.   The lines are:  “I have learnt so many things,
Father.Not just how to make vichyssoise or
calf’s head with sauce vinaigrette, but a much more important recipe.       I have learn how to live,  how to be in the world
and of the world…and not just to stand aside
and watch.     And I will never, never again
run away from life, or from love, either.”  Over the past year, I have learned – learning how to live alone and that standing aside and watching life pass me by is not at all the way I want to live.

Last night I did a “video montage” of my past year in outfits – kind of funny – if you have 10 minutes to kill, take a look. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A1LeRBRvg2g&feature=g-upl    The songs are the important – “This’ll Be My Year” by Train and “Stronger” by Kelly Clarkson.

As I sign off of this year long journey, I look toward the future, so unsure of some things, yet so much stronger.

This year, more than any in the past, I realize that birthdays are not about gifts, not about flowers and cards, but more about the people that help you make your journey around the sun so much brighter.   Cheers to you and to your personal journeys.   I hope that in some way I have inspired or encouraged you and as I am today, I hope you are a better person.

Relationships

My final day of not shopping.  I never thought that I could get here.   I truly believe that my shopping addiction is broken.   I can walk into a store like TJ Maxx and walk right by the clothes and shoes and not feel even the least bit tempted to purchase something.   I don’t know how I did it, but I did it.

At the beginning of this year I truly thought that I was just fighting the shopping demon.   In hindsight, I was fighting a lot of demons;   professional demons, self esteem demons and of course relationship demons.

The professional demons worked themselves out and the esteem demons, well those are ever present – no matter who you are, how much you weigh and how successful you think you are.    The relationship demons, well those are the sticky part.

I was not the best wife, the best friend or the best employee or coworker.  I have taken advantage, I have been angry, I have been selfish and I have also been self absorbed.   I can apologize until I am blue in the face for my actions, but to gain forgiveness one must change their behavior and learn from their mistakes.

Over the past year I have learned so much about relationships and I want to walk you through my journey.     First, relationships need to be forged strong before they can be tested.  I remember sitting by my swimming pool dishing secrets to one of my best friends.   I told her some things that were disappointing to her.  Things that made her think less of me.   Some friends would have judged.  Some friends would have encouraged.  Some friends would have jogged quickly away, saying that they didn’t want the drama.    The friendship with this person was forged from stone and has been tested for years.  Because of the strength of this relationship, this friend is still with me today, standing by my side and giving me the best advice.   My lesson – forge your relationships.   Allow people in and truly be yourself and get to know others at their core.   That is the ONLY way to forge a relationship and make it disaster proof. (bizarre – as I was typing this, the friend called me)

Relationships must be able to change shape.    A year ago, Ed and I were a couple, seemingly happy to everyone around us and we were together.  Now, 12 short months later our relationship has taken a different direction.   The pliability of our relationship and our ability to deal with the changes has created a unique relationship  that is a mix of respect, friendship and still love.   I don’t know how we got here, but I know that our relationship will continue to evolve, as will we as individuals.

The final relationship lesson is that relationships can be found in the most unexpected places.  You never know where your gold medal relationships will come from.   I have developed a few new friendships over the past year that are truly one of a kind.   The friends that I am referring to have been there to help me move and to help me move myself into a better person.   Their neverending support is extraordinary and there is no way that I can ever be the type of friend to them that they are to me.   They listen to me cry, they laugh with me and they wrap their arms around me when I need a hug.   Neither friendship was expected, but now life cannot be lived without their support.    I guess I had my heart open at the right time and for the right person.

A year ago I truly believe that I had a better relationship with my closet than I did with the people around me.   I have worked on my relationships (forged and virgin) and I believe they are better now than ever before.    To those I hurt during my journey, I am sorry.   To those that have been with me throughout the past year, all I can say is “thank you”.

As I wrap up my work day, I am thinking about my evening and getting ready for my birthday.   A night of reflection awaits.   An outfit a day truly has kept the shopping away – who would have thought that it would have also chased the demons away!

The Final Two Days (and more lessons)

This week marks the 20th anniversary of being crowned queen of the Meigs County Fair.    In 1992 my personality was not confident – in fact, I would say that I was a little shy.  I was not “into clothes”.  I was not “bubbly” or “sprite like”.  I never expected to win fair queen (and based on the reactions of my family, they didn’t either).   I remember the night I was crowned, it was a great night – until my parents realized that I had to have a weeks worth of clothes that were appropriate for the events.   We started scrambling to buy and borrow clothes for the week and managed to make it happen.  My parents always “made it work”.  Looking back – I’m not sure how.

Anyway – the point of that story is to say two things –

1. I needed my clothing to reflect the role I had been chosen to play that week.   To this day, the impact of that sticks with me.    I still believe (and will argue until I am blue in the face) that clothing is important to building  your reputation and presenting the best possible you.    A story was told in the office this morning about a person in a business meeting wearing mis matched clothing, complete with dark pants, dark shoes and white socks.   The person said “didn’t he realize that he looked like a moron?”.  For the past year I have worked especially hard to project a professional image.   It would have been so easy for me to pair a black skirt with one of  my 150 shirts – but I didn’t.   I planned, I worked and I achieved my goal.   I work in a very male dominated industry.   Looking professional is extremely important to me and rarely do I miss the mark.   I feel that I am taken more seriously when I look the part!   I would be willing to bet that most business women would agree with me!

The other take away from Fair Queen was that I needed more clothes.   Unfortunately that does not ring true today.    This past weekend my niece Lydia was rummaging through my closet.   She pulled out a dress that I had made when I was a sophomore or junior in high school.  Yes, this dress is still hanging in my closet (the proof is in the photo).  The moral of the story is why do I still have this dress?   I have purged clothing this year.  I have made an effort to get rid of things that I don’t wear or that don’t fit.    With all of this and not shopping, I still have so many clothes.   In fact, the dress that I am wearing today is one that I don’t believe has ever been worn to work.  The dress was purchased in New Orleans at a store called Trash Diva.   Check it out – www.trashydiva.com.    If I were to buy from this store today, I would buy either http://www.trashydiva.com/shop/Trashy-Diva-Audrey-Mini-Dress-SALE-p83.html  or http://www.trashydiva.com/shop/Bustle-Betty-Dress-SALE-p46.html  However, the Frye boots are looking pretty sweet also!

I can truly say that I now know how blessed I am.  I have had the luxury of buying clothing with few restrictions.   I have bargain shopped, I have swapped clothing with friends and what has it gotten me – nothing.    That’s the bottom line – all of my clothes, shoes and belts and scarves – it all means little to me.   What matters is what is on the inside of the clothes.   This year I have found so much perspective.  I have succeeded in stripping myself down to the core.    The song “Strip Me” by Natasha Bedingfield is my story.  Take a listen – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vnhDIGTldho

I have stripped myself this year and I like who I am.

So it’s August 15th.  Two more days until my no shopping year is up and a new year begins.   I can’t believe how quickly the past 12 months have flown by.   Thinking back a year from now and how different some things are and how much some things are still the same.   The still the same things are some good and some bad, but a change is gonna come.

The outfits for the past three days:   Enjoy!!

51 Weeks of Therapy

51 weeks.  I have not shopped for 51 weeks.   I have one week to go before my year of no shopping is over.   We should never live our life in the rearview mirror, but I want to reflect over the last year and figure out what I have learned.   So, for the next few days, I will think about the most impactful lessons and how they have changed my life.   The lessons I believe I have learned are:

-Material possessions do not make a person happier.

-I still have more clothes than I need.

-A wardrobe is still important in projecting a professional reputation.

-What I thought I wanted was not what I needed.

-Relationships (saving this one for the end).

Ok – so let’s dive into the first lesson.   “Material possessions do not make a person happier”.   I was talking with a friend last night and we have both embarked on new challenging journeys in our lives.    We were talking about how spoiled we once were and how we bought pretty much anything we wanted.   At the time that we were doing this, it appeared that we were “happy” with our purchases.   In hindsight, what was missing wasn’t the stuff we were buying, it was the “stuff” inside ourselves.

On January 4th, I started taking down the Christmas Tree.   That day was the day I started packing to leave what had been my home for the past 12+ years.   As the winter days turned colder in February, the packing continued.   As the boxes got filled, the glassware got wrapped and the shoes shoved into a Rubbermaid container – the burden of “stuff” got greater.

I made a decision at the beginning of the packing that for me, the idea of “purging” my stuff would come after I moved.  I figured that the therapeutic nature of purging was going to be more necessary once I was alone.   I believe this was the right choice.  The more I “purged” my stuff, the better I felt.    With every load of clothing that went to the consignment store – I felt lighter.   With every donation to the thrift store, life got a little better.   Stuff is necessary, but it weighs us down.   We don’t have to allow this to happen to us.   I still love my shoes.  I still walk into my closet with a glass of champagne and stare at my clothes.  I still enjoy my Titanic collection.  The difference is that when I look at those things, I realize that they are just things – not catalysts to being happy.

Getting a divorce will put a lot of things into perspective.   For one, you realize that your lives are down to things.   It’s like the Sugarland song “pictures, dishes and socks; it’s our whole lives down to one box”.    Dividing the “stuff” was the easy part.   Dividing the emotions, not so easy.   Ed and I didn’t fight about “stuff”.   The calmness of the process made me realize that it didn’t matter who got the Love Sac, who got the flat screen, and who got more margarita glasses.   What matters is that at the end of the day that Ed and I are whole people and that we continue to be friends and help mate’s for each other.    Who cares who got “more” – it doesn’t matter.   Who would have thought that the “division of property” would change my perspective on stuff.

I know that I am forever changed by this process.   I now find happiness within myself and with those I share my “now” with.   The people around me bring me more happiness than any pair of shoes (however when I am around my “peeps” and wearing a great pair of shoes, that makes the experience better!), the experiences we share are worth more than my entire wardrobe and I know that their lives have touched me forever.

As I begin my last week of no shopping, I wonder what is next.   I know that my shopping temptation has seriously subsided and that my addiction to spending money on useless items has passed.    I am changed.    I am a much better version of me and my happiness gets stronger every day.

Todays outfit – a blue suit.   To give you some perspective of my wardrobe – I have had this suit in my closet for years.  As I got dressed this morning, the tags had to be removed from this suit, making me wonder if I could go another year!

Have a great weekend people and I hope that my lesson #1 sticks with you also.

My Latest Project

I moved into my house in May. When I moved in I had a certain look and feel in mind for each space. When I looked at my “clean slate” 12 x 18 space in the downstairs of my split level, I immediately knew what the room would be. I was going to create a space that was the quentisential “Bobbie” room. I think I achieved the look.

My new room, which has been named by my friend Shannon as the “Orchid Lounge” is exactly what I wanted. Let’s go through the room a little at a time:

The room will be the main relaxing space in my house. I chose colors that are modern and reflect my personality. From this angle, you see my new black leather and tweed couch. Purchased at Value City Furniture for $528! A great deal! I wanted a couch that was wide and long and this couch definately fit the bill. I love that the cushions can be removed, making it perfect for taking a nap! I accented the couch with purple throw pillows and will add some additional colors as well. I am thinking bright green! The rug is also a bargain find from Ikea – grand total price $19.99! The style works so well with everything else that was chosen.

Turning around you see my wonderful mirror. This mirror was salvaged from my parents house. It sat upon their dresser (to be shown later). I painted it and after much “engineering” figured out how to hang it at an angle. To my friend Dave, thanks for the idea of hanging it at an angle! Great idea!

From the couch view, you get a great view of my parents dresser. I painted it, tiled the top (Thanks Aunt Susie for this idea) and it serves as my entertainment center. My dvd’s and cd’s are in the drawers and this greatly reduces the clutter! You also get to see my great coffee table. A closer view to be shown in a few. You get an idea of the size of the room and how it all is organized.

In the distance you can see the bar area. The bar area is comprised of my wine cooler and my multi tier bar (purchased for $45 at a consignment store). I used a black wooden box to hold my bar accessories. The next thing to add is a small black fridge to complete the look! The Eifell Tower progression photo was a gift from an old friend from college. Still looks as beautiful as it did 13 years ago! Take a closer gander at my bar:

On this side of the room is also my “music corner”. The posters are a collection of concert ads, as well as signed Broadway Musical Cast posters (purchased from Gabriel Brothers during one of their “Bloomingdales” sales. Love this corner. My Ipod Dock completes this corner. The table was purchased at Goodwill for $2.50 and spray painted black (paint $3.50). A good deal? I think so.

The final thing I want to show you is my coffee table. This is a steamer trunk that was on the Queen Mary. It is marked with a Cunard Line sticker (for my fellow Titanic nerds – you will appreciate this). The trunk table is completed with a large slab of glass (thanks Shannon and Chad) and my Audrey Hepburn artwork (thanks Ed). From this angle, you can see my large window that is on my purple wall ( Thanks Tracy for the painting help!).

I invite you to the Orchid Lounge for a cocktail or a nice relaxing movie night! Thank you to my friends who helped me complete the project! Special thanks to Ed. Chad. Shannon and Tracy. You all rock!

The outfit today is all white with a splash of color in my scarf. Have a fabulous day!!!!!

Inspiration From Michael Phelps (and his abs)

I was watching the Olympics on Saturday night and the mens swimming relay finals were on.   I gotta say, by the time the USA team had gotten out of the water and were standing by the announcer, I was moved (to go get a towel and wipe up my drool).

Did you see those abs?  In case you didn’t – take a look here:

Well done USA!   I listened to some interviews with Michael Phelps who now is the recipient of a record breaking 18 Olympic Gold Medals.    The interviews were interesting and I gotta say, I was impressed.

I googled Michael Phelps quotes and came up with a few that I thought were interesting/inspirational –

I won’t predict anything historic. But nothing is impossible. I love this quote.    There are times when I think “I can make history”.   But in all reality,  we don’t have to make history, but what we do need to do is to make our history worth telling.   I’m working on that more and more every day.   The realization that the past is the past and that historic moments are in the making, even as we speak (or write).

Every day after I wake up, I think, ‘Wait… this can’t be real; I’m still going to wake up.’   Sometimes in life we have things happen, good or bad that seem surreal – the “wait did that just happen” moment.    We hope that those moments are the “dream” moments instead of the “nightmare” ones.    No matter what, you have to face the moment when you wake up and realize its real.   The important thing is to make sure you are surrounded by soft pillows (great friends) and a great mattress (self esteem) to absorb that moment.

I learned how fast you can go from being an international hero to being a reference in a joke on a late night talk show. The moral here – I’ve said it before – never take youself so seriously that you can’t laugh when you become the butt of the joke!   Last week the Alpha team went bowling to celebrate being awarded recent projects.   One of the bowlers had a really bad roll (more like throwing a softball) and the bowling ball went into the other lane.   This person has been teased and teased, but they always play along and don’t mind being poked with fun.   Michael Phelps realized how fast he fell from grace and also the amount of humor (and hard work) it took to get him back to the top.

You can’t put a limit on anything.    Few things have limits (Presidential terms, the time on the clock at a football game, the credit card limit – those are limits)  What we can’t put limits on are our dreams and goals.  The things that we want and need in life.   If you want something badly enough, you won’t put a limit on how hard you will try to achieve it.

I hope you find inspiration in the Olympic stories that are being told.   I am moved by the stories of the “underdog” that comes out on top.   Gives me hope!

As for Michael Phelps abs – well, those will be the moments that dreams are made of (and please don’t pinch me to wake me up).

Ed’s Birthday – Reasons To Celebrate

Today is Ed’s birthday.   For years Ed celebrated his birthday by throwing his own birthday party.   I had the pleasure of waiting tables the night of Ed’s 50th (see photo from 8/2/98).   The past 14 years have been full of adventure, laughter and recently a few tears.

However, the sadness of recent months should not dampen the fact that Ed deserves to celebrate and here’s why:

1.  He gives back and that deserves to be celebrated.  Next week is the Mon County Fair.  Ed and his team work diligently to bring a high caliber event to the citizens of Mon County.  Ed – thank you for working so hard to get this event rekindled and you should celebrate this success.

2.  He never needs an excuse to have a good time – Ed doens’t need a birthday to celebrate life.  He celebrates every day and I envy that attitude.   His desire to have fun is unmatched and that deserves to be recognized.  Tonight Ed will be playing trivia at Gibbies if you are in Morgantown, I am sure that he would love to share a drink with you, so stop by and see him!

3.  He needs a break!   Ed works harder than anyone I know.  When he gets home from work, he continues to work – mowing grasss, working in the garden and now building a village – Ed take a break, spend a few hours having fun for your birthday.  I dare you.

Happy birthday my friend.   I hope that you truly do take the time to celebrate.   Facebook friends – if you have not done so, please take a moment to wish Ed a happy birthday and tell him he truly deserves to celebrate!

5 Things A Day

I was talking with a friend and business associate at a function earlier this week.  He suffered some serious health problems a few years back and had to have open heart surgery.   His attitude regarding this health scare was refreshing.   He changed his outlook on life and I asked how he kept himself in check.   His answer was “Every day I find 5 things to be thankful for”.   We take so much for granted, we complain about everything and we stress over things we cannot control (seriously, who cares if you eat at Chic Fil A) and we truly don’t appreciate what we are blessed with.

I hope I am a thankful person, but today I want to follow the advice of my friend and truly think about 5 things I am thankful for:

1.  My friend Shannon – rarely do people “get you”.   This friend gets me, understands me, keeps me in check and isn’t afraid to tell me I am being ridiculous.   She is a phenomenol friend and has brought a tremendous amount of laughter and tears to my life.

2.  My bedroom – by far my favorite room in my home.   I walk into my bedroom and I smile.  No matter if I made the bed when I got up or picked up the clothes on the floor – no matter the chaos (internal and external) – my bedroom is my sanctuary.

3.  The digital photo frame on my desk – I have always been a picture person.  Right now I have a digital photo frame on my desk with a couple hundred photos that scroll through.  No matter the mood, there are always photos that make me smile – either by reminding me of a special day and more likely, a special person.

4.  A job that challenges me – no lie, today has been a challenging day.   I could not imagine not having a job and more so, not having a job that challenges me.   My version of hell would to be stuck in a factory, repeating the same task minute after minute.   Insanity would soon follow.

5.  The taste of fresh corn – bought some corn this weekend and had a piece at lunch.  The taste of fresh corn on the cob, especially this time of year is worth a mention.   Yum, yum.

I know, random thoughts by Bobbie.   Remember to pick out your five things to be thankful for.   I hope you have more than 5, because I know I do.   I am one blessed individual.

Todays outfit – I was describing it on the phone as I was getting ready for work and the person on the other line said “wait, you’re wearing a wife-beater”.   Not quite, just a white tank top with a knee lenght denim skirt.

Going to see CASH tonight at the WVPT – maybe tomorrow I will write about the experience.   Have a great night friends.

The Road Home

I grew up on a Rural Mail Route (Route 2, Box 161); 2 mile gravel road; 25 minutes to the closest McDonalds; 12 miles to the closest gas station and when the power went out, well we were the last house restored.   As a child, I thought this was the most awful place.  My friends didn’t live close by, I lived on a hill making bike riding difficult and calling any of my friends was a long distance call.   Torture to a teenage girl!

This weekend I decided to spend some time back in Ohio to do some reconnecting and rejuvenating.   It worked.    I want to share with you my journey home.

The road back home begins with paved roads and plenty of traffic.  The roads are congested and the drive is frustrating.   The closer I get home, the less congested the road and more importantly, the less congested my head.    I can honestly feel my stress start to subside as each mile passes.

I don’t take the opportunity to spend much time back in Ohio.   This weekend was an exception.  I left Morgantown Friday after work and began my journey.   The purpose of my visit was to deliver birthday gifts, but in hindsight, the greatest gifts were received by me.

I always have my camera with me and it helped chronicle my weekend.   I will share my journey through my camera lens:

I wasn’t joking – the road home is gravel!   I wasn’t planning for this photo to look this way, but it’s rather symbolic.   We rarely see the road in the distance because what is in focus if the road right in front of us.   I am glad that I looked past the road right in front of me and took the long road home.

As a child, this road provided hours of entertainment on a snowy day, as well as a very entertaining walk with my brothers sheep “Harry and Bess”.   The sheep ran down the hill and I decided to slide along behind them.   Letting go of the lead would have been the intelligent choice.   Common sense must have been missing that day!

The house that awaits on my long journey home isn’t the home I grew up in.  But the soul of the house is still there.   The soul is still there because that’s where my family is.   I talk about my brother Robin a tremendous amount; but I rarely talk about my brother JT.   He is the baby of the family and as a child, he was a brat.   He and I fought like crazy, argued about everything and occasionally threw things at each other.   As an adult, I look back and smile (mostly because I won the throwing contests) – I also look at him and beam with pride.  He has created a house that comforts my parents as they age, combined with a healthy environment for his three beautiful daughters.   His daughters are such beautiful little people and their Aunt Bobbie is so proud to be in their lives.

When Robin, JT and I get together, something happens and we regress in age.   We are goofy, silly, make crude jokes and laugh until we cry.   This weekend definitely filled my “laugh” bank.   I wish I could share the silly moments with you (and the hilarious photos that followed) — what I will share is this — we all take ourselves so seriously.  We work to be the best versions of ourselves, we try to be on top of our game – but when we dig deep, the best version of me is the one I can laugh at (and encourage others to laugh with me).   This weekend, my brothers brought out the best version of me.  Thank you for bringing me back to my roots.

The three of us also took a few minutes to reflect on the past and also look forward.   The older we get, the more our lives seem to go in different directions.    It’s good to look to the future as a team, to face what is coming with hands held together and a common goal.   Isn’t that what being a family is all about?

The road home needs to happen more frequently.  My dad just turned 82 and I am so amazed by his resilience.  He has been broken and repaired more times than we can count.  The one thing that has not been broken is his spirit.   Between him and my mother, their lives have not been easy.  They suffer pain on a constant basis and I don’t know how they function.  They are amazing people and I am proud to call them my partns.  I am not living in denial.  I know that the inevitable will happen.   We don’ t know when or how – but what I know is that I will do everything I can to stir up dust on Carr Road every chance I get over the next few years – making the journey home as often as possible.  I won’t make the mistake of looking back and wishing I had learned more from them.

I know it appears to some that my life is fueled with concerts, travel and shopping – I promise you I am much more easily entertained than that.   This weekend was great, because it was simple.   Lunch (and dinner) at the Cone and Shake, some time in the hay field, the laughter of children and some time playing in the water and basking in the sun.  It doesn’t get more simple than that and to me, this weekend ranks near the top of the year.

Some of you may read this and think “who the hell cares”.    Being a family is difficult.  There is sadness, grief, anger, resentment, and stress at times.   However, because we are family, those times are lessened by weekends like this.  If you have not pulled your family together for a while to rekindle the fire, do it.   I wrote on Friday about filling my “tanks”.  I promise you that after my weekend, my cup runneth over.

If you have not taken a journey home recently, I encourage you to.  I promise you that the healing powers of the journey home will heal most of what’s ailing you.   Once you make the journey, you can stand up, brush yourself off and start your next journey.

 

Filling The Tank

I got gas earlier today and at $3.58 a gallon, I felt like I was pumping gold into my tank.   Of course, a random thought during a mundane task led to my blog today.   Filling the tank with gasoline is one thing, but what about the rest of the tanks that we have.

Today is Friday and Henry and I am preparing to leave for the weekend.   This weekend I get to fill several of my tanks.   The first tank that I get to fill is my relaxation tank.   I got a text from my brother Robin earlier that said he could not wait to veg on his couch and watch the Olympic Games opening ceremonies.   I totally agree.   I anticipate sweat pants, a t shirt, surrounded by family and plenty of mindless tv watching.   So, between the relaxation tonight and the water park on Sunday, I will fill my relaxation bank.

We all need physical contact and hugs are a great way to show love and receive love.   I know that when I see my nieces and nephew this weekend, I will refill my hug bank.   Few things feel better to me than a hug and the hugs from Hannah, Lydia, Cheyenne, Lilly, Olivia and Riley are truly priceless.   Add to that a great hug from my mom and dad – and I am golden.

The “family” tank is running on empty.  In the past, this weekend has been spent attending Ed’s family reunion with his extended family.  Always a great time with great food, fabulous cookies and even better company.  I gotta admit, it makes me a little sad to think about not making the journey.   So, this weekend I am filling my family bank with my family.   My dad turned 83 yesterday (thanks to my crazy friends for singing happy birthday to him last night on the phone).   I can’t wait to sit with him, hopefully on their front porch and listen to him tell a story or two.   Maybe my mom and I can spend some time at a yard sale or two.   By the end of the weekend, my cup will be running over with family love.

Henry gets to fill his tank as well. He and his buddy Ginger will play and run and bark at each other and by the end of the weekend, I am sure he will be exhausted, but smiling. 

I hope that you get to fill your tank this weekend – be it with family, friends, food, or fuel – fill the tank and remember to top it off, you never know when  you will get it filled again.

Happy Friday friends.